You’ve seen these schmooze artists I’m sure. They are the ones that have a business card in hand ready to hand them out to anyone and eager to get from anyone. They have that pre-rehearsed elevator speech and are ready to deliver it even if you’re not ready to hear it. These type of people are generally out for themselves and have a false sincerity. This is the image that many people have when they hear the word — “networking.”
The reality is these are networking jerks. They don’t have the foggiest idea what true connecting is about or the value of meaningful trust-based relationships. In Keith Ferrrazi’s book, Never Eat Alone he shares a few rules to ensure you never become a “networking jerk:”
- Don’t schmooze. Have something to say and say it with passion. Make sure you have something to offer when you speak, and offer it with sincerity.
- Don’t rely on the currency of gossip. It just creates lack of trust in the long run.
- Don’t come to the party empty-handed. In connecting, you’re only as good as what you give away.
- Don’t treat those under you poorly.
- Be transparent. People respond with trust when they know you’re dealing straight with them.
- Don’t be too efficient. Reaching out to others is not a numbers game. Nothing comes off as less sincere than receiving a mass e-mail. It’s not about mass —- it’s about connecting.
Nice People
Sometimes, you just get lucky. I have quite limited technical skills (for those of you that do have technical skill – you have no idea how frustrating this can be!) A few months ago David Bush with MyMortgageCommunity.com told me
Jeff:
I couldn’t agree more- as you mentioned yesterday at group, it’s always about connecting, building relationship. I attribute a large amount of my success to the fact that I served tables for 10+ years. No two customers are alike- and to your point, you can’t schmooze. Regardless of your product that you represent, the person across from you has to first be comfortable with YOU (ie invest with you, before they invest in a bottle of wine and a steak or a home mortgage) then and only then have you added another satisfied client to your profile. Lastly, I think you would agree, more than anything, our top clients always want our most precious commodity- TIME. More than a discount or anything else, we as business owners, get up and do it all over again and communicate to that client we care about you, what can we do for you, who could I refer to you, in short, “how can I be your personal problem solver first and then your mortgage specialist?”
Chef Mark
ReMARkable Affairs Catering
That’s a great example of the principles applied in Keith’s book!